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IMAGINE if you were the only person who spoke English in a room full of French speaking people. How would you feel? How would you connect? Sign language? Hand gestures? It would feel frustrating, wouldn't it? Trying to explain something to someone and all you get is a blank stare.

Relationships can be like that. You enter into a relationship with one language that you know really well, you speak it to your partner, such as: I will say I love you everyday, and it makes sense to you. Then your partner starts listening to you, and it doesn't register. You don't get them because you think you are loving them by saying 'I love you'. You get frustrated, annoyed, and anxious.

We naturally love ourselves first, then think about others. We love to be loved by other people the way WE NEED to be loved. But how do people love us if they don't know our love language? We need to know our love language and our spouses' love language to be able to connect to each other meaningfully.


What I don't understand is that so many couples go through life thinking they are connected with their partners. But in actual fact they're not. They haven't got a clue as to what their partners are needing in terms of love and affection. And they get frustrated and angry.

Do they need the kiss that you’re not giving? A hug that you withhold? Washing dishes? Are they in need of uplifting words such as 'you can do this' phrase in the morning. We need to stop and think. Are we loving each other the right way?

The Five Love Languages book by Gary Chapman has stood out in a few conversations this week on my show. I've had two recent interviews with two couples, one have been married for seven years, and the other 33. They both mentioned the same book.

"I am his biggest cheerleader", Lynn said.

Lynn has been married to her husband Andy for a whopping 33 years, and they still date.

How on earth do they do that? In the interview [video above] Andy and Lynn go deeper into why their relationship has stood the test of time. One thing stood out was that they both are intentional and they want to make things work. They have the will. But there’s more to it. They explain in the interview how they got to that stage, that 33 years on, they are as fresh and vibrant as when they first started dating.

One of the books they read which changed their relationship is no other than The five languages of love book.

There's five love languages: Physical Touch, Quality Time, Acts of Service, Gifts and Words of affirmation.

You could have more than one love language, but you will also have two or three or even all of the five. When you read the book, you will be able to identify your top three. And that’s when you are able to really understand yourself, and your language, and how you need to be loved. When your husband or partner does the same thing, you both begin to understand each other to be able to have a deeper connection and appreciation for one another. You realise that put must put each other first and think about what your partner needs, before meeting yours, and loving them their way, rather than your way.

No doubt this will take your relationship to a whole another level.


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Updated: May 22, 2021

It wasn’t all negative news. So, I’ve been off air for five months, on a break, you could say. I sense a friends’ flash back moment coming right through.

Me and my cameraman Chris went out and did a shoot in central city, in Auckland, New Zealand. I thought I knew what I was doing. I’ve just met Chris, and having him to help out was awesome. I had to explain to him what I was about, and what I wanted out of our shoot. Little did I know, I realized that I didn’t understand what I was doing.

The epiphany that came to me, later on, was that figuring things out comes sometimes later. It’s strange and a mystery. As much as I wanted to know how to plan a shoot sometimes I just had to meet with him, talk about it, and do it, then make things up on the go.

I think I am more of a spontaneous performer on camera. But I also need to be organized and actually have a plan.

So we went out to central city and spoke to people on the streets. It was a ‘putting myself out there outside the box’ type experience. But equally rewarding. The more out of the box you are, the better you are, I think. (Keep the box for sleeping)

I think I am more of a spontaneous performer on camera. But I also need to be organised and actually have a plan.

We chatted to wonderful couples and single men who shared their testimonies, their take on dating and relationships and where they are in life at the moment. It was surprisingly raw and passionate.

I of course had the odd ‘no thank you’ or ‘I’ve got an appointment and I am late’ type response, which was okay, I actually welcomed those responses. It made me more determined to speak to that next person or couple. The episode came out good and I was happy.

Another epiphany. Don’t be perfect. Just do what you can with what you have. My camera, Nikon D5600 is a great camera but it’s great for beginners who are just starting out. There are settings that are useful but the camera doesn’t have, such as listening back to audio, having full control recording in manual mode. Things that Chris pointed out. I am every so grateful.


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  • Writer's pictureMina Amso

Welcome to my website, it's been one hill of a journey. The Mina Amso Show is ON!

If you told me that I'd be setting up a website for my online show a year ago, I'd be like "hmm, okay, right". But here I am. I hope you like what you see. Trust me, it took me so long to make this website, perhaps it would have taken other people a few hours.

I like things to look good, sometimes perfect, and to my detriment, that means things taking way more time than anticipated. So I am learning that, slowly. I have my very own WEBSITE, I can safely say that it was worth it.

You get to be quite creative using Wix websites, have to say thought that there are a few bugs (no pun intended... wait... or is it?) that drove me crazy in this process.

If you thought you can't do your own website, and that you're not good enough for a special representation, then think again my friend. What you need is a dash of "watch me do it" and a hint of "I don't give a crush" and a lil addition of "Opps, I did it".

These blogs will tell the story behind the story. I will go behind the scenes to show you how I do what I do, and sometimes why I do what I do. Although you can read about that in my About Page So I am looking forward to this journey. I've been off air or off line for about five months now prepping for the launch of season 3. I didn't think it was going to take that long but here we are.

Who am I interviewing on Season 3 on DATING and RELATIONSHIPS? Read the next blog to find out!

(Did I just tease you? ;)


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